Headlines: Thunder Dan sells out?

It was another solid day for the hardest-working man in college basketball. As usual, Dan Werner turned in a workman-like performance with solid defense and four hard-fought rebounds only he could get. And can you ever say enough about the hustle?

If there is a more fundamentally sound player out there, I sure haven’t seen him. Once again Werner did all the little things in UF’s 81-58 win over Bradley on Sunday. But he also dropped 17 points.

Could it be that the gritty Dan Werner is selling out? Has he traded in his lunch pail and hard hat for the glitz and glamour of offensive stardom? Say it aint so, Thunder. Say it aint so….

Did you happen to catch the game? If you did, you probably saw UF “center” (and we use that term very loosely) Alex Tyus getting abused by 7-foot Bradley giant David Collins.

It probably didn’t help that his backup, freshman Kenny Kadji, looked scared to death every time he got the ball.

As much as we here at CS love “The Valley” no mid-major school should push around an SEC team like that. Good luck against Syracuse, guys.

Nick Calathes was cleared of wrong doing in a gambling investigation conducted by the UF Athletic department. Calathes reportedly lost $600 playing online poker. Online poker is not prohibited by the NCAA. So, no big deal really. The most interesting thing about this story is we found out Calathes sucks at poker. You’re invited to my next game, Nick. Maybe you can bring your boy Teddy “how can you rape someone you love?” Dupay.

In shocking news, the women’s basketball team lost again . Way to go girls. You’re really keeping the Carolyn Peck legacy alive. The Gators were beat by Florida Gulf Coast. A school that is still making the transition to Division I. I’m sure Tennessee and LSU should be no problem at all.

Flipside: The Gators basketball team deserves its No. 19 ranking

Everyone loves a good argument (if you don't, you're just not American) and that's what we're going to strive to give you in our Flipside columns. Two of our writers will argue both sides of an issue and you (the reader) should help us pick who's the winner and who doesn't know what they're talking about at all. The first topic we bring you is this: Should the Gators basketball team be ranked No. 19 in the preseason polls? I'm holding down the 'yes' and Falco hits in the two-hole with the 'no.' Read and discuss.

Preseason Polls are a projection of how good a team will be, regardless of what anyone says.

They can’t possibly be an evaluation of past performances because of the influx of new freshman and former role players stepping into big-time minutes.

The argument that the Gators haven’t shown the country enough to be No. 19 is completely right and not up for debate, but that sentiment could be extended to every team in Division I.

Last I checked, the ‘Heels record is still 0-0, but no one has a problem with their No. 1 ranking. Conversely, the defending champion Jayhawks start at No. 24 because they aren’t PROJECTED to be as good, otherwise they’d still be No. 1, right?

So maybe the argument is that UF has done nothing to “earn” even the mildest of expectations that come along with a mention in the Top 25. Pollsters gave the team too much credit based on the recent National Championships won by the ‘04s and Billy Donovan.

If the Gators were thrown into the top 10, I’m with ya, that’s presumptuous. But at 19, they’re merely being recognized as a pretty solid team under reasonable expectations to improve.
Billy D has assembled a young, talented squad with as much right to be No. 19 as anyone else.

Preseason polls take many factors into account: a program’s history, coaching, the previous performance of players and, most importantly, how good a team can be at the peak of its potential.

Humor me for a second.

Let’s say Nick “Get Your Hands Ready” Calathes drops 15 points and eight assists per game en rout to becoming a top five point guard.

Walter “Two Left Hands” Hodge, Dan “Head Fake” Werner and Chandler “Baby Face” Parsons provide timely scoring from the perimeter, while Alex “Sir Dunksalot” Tyus and Kenny “Soft Body” Kadji become scrappy low post point-producers and paint-protectors.

Then, Erving “Got Range?” Walker and Ray “Lockdown” Shipman live up to the hype and garner serious off-the-bench minutes in addition to either Eloy “The Stickman” Vargas or Allan “B-More” Chaney becoming serviceable enough to be on the court with one of the other bigs.

They’re not a No. 19 team at the end of the year if that happens?

Maybe not, but at least I just gave you nicknames for the entire 10-man rotation, which is more than you can say for those preseason rankings.

Flipside: There's no way Florida should be ranked No. 19

Everyone knows preseason polls are a crap shoot, and it’s been debated many times over whether they should even be done.

But let’s assume they have point.

(Yes, this is kind of like when your wife says, OK let’s assume you have a point, so she can just yell at you for something else and then go back and say the assumption is all wrong).

I’m just here to tell you Florida men’s basketball team should not be ranked No. 19. The Gators are not the 19^th-best team in the country. They’re not now, they won’t be midseason, and come March, they’ll be fighting for a NCAA Tournament berth.

To prove this to you, let me show you some examples of things that are No. 19.

Heading into this weekend’s games, the Florida State football team are No. 19 in the USA Today/Coaches' poll. At 7-2, the Seminoles have been a welcome surprise on the field, although they have struggled in conference play a bit. While hard for Gators fans to hear, the Florida State football team deserves more praise than the Florida men's hoops team. They're better.

But see this goes beyond sports. Ali Larter is No. 19 on FHM’s 100 Sexiest Women of 2008. Let’s just say Florida men’s basketball team does not get me excited the way the 32-year-old’s character – an Internet stripper with multiple personality disorder (what makes her unique?) and super strength – does.

In fact people believed her impersonation in Esquire of an imaginary budding celebrity. Maybe for her next act, she’ll pretend to be my girlfriend. Hey, a man can dream, right?

But if you want an excuse of how things could go wrong in polls, Britney Spears was ranked No. 19 in Maxim’s Top 100 this year. Let’s see: Spears started out on the Mickey Mouse Club and then later hit rock bottom and is now staggering to make a late comeback, although things might not be able to be saved.

It’s OK though, Billy D can probably relate to the situation. A soft schedule allowed Florida to start strong, the Gators later struggled, and then Donovan locked his team out of its gym to right the ship. Now everyone thinks all is well.

To recap: The Gators want to be like the hot girl on Heroes, not the has-been pop teen singer.

Girls really do always get the final word.

Spurrier still loved in Gainesville

If you're looking to kill some time this afternoon (after reading everything on this site, of course) check out Sports Illustrated's Andy Staples, who writes a pretty solid story detailing the relationship between Gators fans and South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier.

Staples talks about the two kinds of Gators fans: ones who will always appreciate what Spurrier did for Florida and hold a soft spot in their hearts for him, and those "You're either with us or against us" assholes that will probably hold up stupid signs during the game.

Here's one of those assholes.

Clearing up the Bill Bates situation

Earlier today we told you about Tennessee's mysterious death wish for former football player Bill Bates, and it looks like we have an answer for why the UT journalism school ran stories on its Web site claiming Bates was dead (he isn't).

According to commenter 'blair' who we'll assume is Blair Bolick, author of the story where Bates died in a plane crash, the stories were done as part of a class assignment to practice web formatting, and the teacher assured the class they wouldn't be available to the public.

Whoops. The stories still show up on Google and can be viewed with the 'Cached' link, leading to some rumors that Bates had died in Italy, a plane crash or of a heart attack while riding a horse.

The stories got widespread enough that Bates' kids had to put up Facebook messages assuring people their father was alive and well.

When practicing obituaries (a major hobby of mine) I usually tend to either choose people who are actually deceased or make someone up, not pick someone who is alive and make up quotes from former teammates about how he will be missed.

Nice work Rocky Top.

Headlines: Meyer says give it to the Duck

Teams everywhere are using direct snaps to receivers and running backs to get a spark on offense, and they're coming up with catchy names for the formation at an equally swift pace.

The "Wildcat" is becoming popular in the NFL, Arkansas used the "Wild Hog" with Darren McFadden and Felix Jones, and coach Houston Nutt brought that with him to Ole Miss, calling it the "Wild Rebel."

So what's Urban Meyer's name for UF's version with Percy Harvin? You guessed it, the Wild Duck.

That's just a cover though. He really calls it the "Let's get Percy some touches before he kills Jeffery Demps" formation.

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The Orlando Sentinel's Mike Bianchi claims UF fans would like to see Steve Spurrier and his loveable gang of Gamecocks beat the Gators on Saturday, then clarifies.

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Linebacker Ryan Stamper is basically a swiss army knife for the Gators' defense, playing at all three LB spots and doing it well. He's also considered one of the team's major leaders. Check him out.

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Bucky Dent's son signs to play baseball for UF (way at the bottom).

Tennessee has it in for Bill Bates

Remember Bill Bates?

He was the Tennessee player famously run over by Hershel Walker who went from undrafted free agent to special teams dynamo and one-time Pro Bowler for the Dallas Cowboys (that second link is definitely worth a watch).

Bates was a fan favorite with both teams, which makes the fact that the UT journalism school's news Web site wants him dead surprising.

The cleverly-named Tennessee Journalist held two stories on its site, four days apart, both claiming Bates was dead.

The stories are now 404'd, but that magical 'cached' link on Google saves the day.
Story 1: Published Oct. 24, Bates dies in a plane crash en route to giving a motivational speech in Kansas, complete with quotes from former teammates.
Story 2: Four days later, Bates' wife confirms he died in Rome, Italy, but he apparently also died of a heart attack in Texas while riding a horse (near bottom of story). Merrill Hoge gives a touching remembrance quote.

Outside of the obvious major factual differences between the two stories (the second one even puts different ages in the headline and first paragraph) there's another big problem.

Bill Bates isn't dead. Not even a little. He even owns a Cowboy Ranch.

Clearly, things aren't going well in Knoxville right now. Two weeks ago, the Vols gave coach Phil Fulmer the axe and they're trying to kill off Bates.

Watch your back, Peyton Manning.